When in Rome

Uh, Ron, that saying doesn't really apply here. Well, actually it kinda does. Rome. A lifetime would not be enough! But i will attempt to convey the sheer amazement which every single day brought on my Roman Holiday...not the film fool, my actual holiday!!

Day 1 in Rome...post sweaty arrival at Termini and an even sweatier bus ride to some obscure monument (which was to be a point of reference in finding one of the most elusive hostels in history), engtalian directions to said elusive hostel and finally arrival at hostel it was time to sight see. And see the sights we did. **Refer to previous post for wicked explanation of former death centre/amusement park.

Next came the Monumento Vittorio Emanuele II, a grandiose white marble beast, honouring the first king of a united Italy, which was dazzling when lit by the late afternoon sunshine.

Such a sight could only be topped by something delicious to put into my grumbling belly and it was henceforth we decided to venture to the Trevi Fountain in search of Gelato. And wow! I would give my left pinky to go back now. I mean...the left pinky is really kind of useless, no? Argh...i digress. Winding through narrow cobble stoned lanes, dodging scooters, shiny cars ( which i swear must have been enchanted; for their ability to be in such tiny lanes defied all logic...bus in Harry Potter 3 anyone??) and imigrants selling 'genuine' Dolce and Gabana (hello?) handbags, strategically laid out on blankets which could easily be swept up as the sellers flee from the Carabinieri, we found the place were wishes are made and our Gelato wishes were granted. The Romans have an uncanny ability to illumiate fountains in a way which gives a 5star hotel pool advertisement hue to the water and a most ominous presence to the crowning sculptural decoration. Sitting in a post-gelato sugar coma and throwing pennies over our shoulders into the blue abyss (the first to ensure your return to Rome, the second for a personal wish) i was horrified but simultaneously amazed at a roaming gypsy's ingenuity. Along comes beardy with an extendable rod with a magnet at the end picking out pennies from the fountain!!! I was so amazed by his device i failed to realise he was taking my wishes!! Never fear...the 2nd time i threw in so far he would require a life vest to go fishing for them!!! In your face gypolata!!

In an vain effort to walk off the gelato we climbed an excessively steep hill to watch the sunset over Piazza del Popolo, in the centre of which sits an Obelix pilfered from Egypt thousands of years ago!! At this point ´the lunch time pasta high had wavered and it was nearing the time to wind the backstreets of Rome back to our nun fortress of a hostel to prepare for the coming day of bliss!



Having explored a munite corner of the east bank of the Tevere, the following day was devoted to visiting the most religiously concentrated quarter in existence. The Vatican city.

An independent state with its own currency and police force. Brimming with devout Catholic pilgrims, religiously apathetic youngsters and vestment clad priests, this is an unmissable experience. The queues, the security, the strict dress code; when one finally enters the heart quickens at the opulence. Every corner of the Basilica San Pietro (burial site of one of Jesus# 12 apostles; Peter) is dripping in gold and religous art. History's popes are entombed within and for those Dan Brown fans out there, the altar which Ewan McGregor once stands beside in Angels and Demons, a four pillared obscure looking thing (baldacchino), is one piece of Bronze and was made, in part, by Michelangelo himself. TRIVIA!!! From the basilica a 3km queue around the walls of the Vatican city lead us to the Sistine Chapel and adjoining museum, where centuries of obscenely lavish treasures were gathered and stored by consecutive popes. An entire menagerie of carved marble animals in the first room is merely the beginning of a most fascinating and simultaneously frightful journey through the overt riches of the Catholic church. Beware of this journey though, as all individuality is sucked form you and the crowd moves as one. A bleating, photo taking herd being shepherded through kilometres of corridors, where every square inch of wall and ceiling is masterfully adorned by works of Michelangelo and his artistic counterparts of the day, including hundreds of square metres of Raphael's tapestries. It is a strange feeling when one finally descends the narrow stone steps into the silent hall of the Sistine Chapel, (the site of Papal Conclaves although more reknowned for being the home of Michelangelo's work 'Creation', whereby God's hand is giving Adam life). I could have spent days gazing, jaw dropped at the wonder which covered every space of ceiling and wall in the Chapel. I won't try and be witty here as it would be too disrespectful to the years of mastery which went into creating such a space.

On the eve of my planned departure it was time to let our hair down. Wine is cheaper than water and restaurants serve pasta well after midnight so we were set for a blast! The night saw us in the tre cosy Campo dei Fiori eating pasta and interrogating locals as to the reason behind uneven coupling ( whereby a fairly attractive male is seen with a ghastly female mate) and the rates of adultery. Results: Italian men will almost definately stray and only date ugly girls as prety girls won't mother them as well. Love it! But never fear, not all males in Italy are twats. The tourists are ok!

Here is the fun part...I had everything booked for Prague and was to fly out of Rome the following day. Didn't happen. Unable to tear myself away from what Rome had to offer i never got on the flight. I never saw the castles or the cheap beer, instead i romed hahah roamed the Pantheon and the Piazza Venezia, unable to remove the giant smile plastered fast to my pink face. I wandered the Roman Forum and tiny backstreets, so pleased with myself and utterly titillated at the thought of the extraordinary people i had met and sights i had seen.

The sky was a most vivid blue, the crumbling ruins blindingly white, the parks painfully green, life was marvellous!! The only thing that dragged me from my fantastical world of wine, british accents and history was the thought of meeting my family for the first time in Poland. Now i know why i m the way i am...