This post will be quite short as, as it is, i am scratching my head as to recall the exact chronology and contents of the trip...
Anyway...the Netherlands! With Amsterdam a mere 3hr train trip from Bochum it would be criminal to miss this city and all its decriminalised criminality! Yee! The train system in Germany is so über fantastische, they have posters on the platform depicting colour-coded numbered carriages; first and second classes and most importantly, the restaurant cart, and information on exactly which section of the platform each carriage will stop, unlike Poland, whereby the tor, of which there are normally around 5 on a platform of around 200m in length, is announced approximately 30 sec prior to a train pulling in to the station. So one has about 15 sec to rush madly to their designated carriage, normally dodging a wave of people bolting in the opposite direction and irritated, screaming conductors, with oversized bag swaying the spine in a most precarious manner all because there is no poster!
I have been sidetracked!! Back to the trip. Arriving to the most ornate station i have seen yet, Centraal station, (they write funny and speak even funnier but i will return to that!) i was met by a most handsome chaperone who was to accompany me through Amsterdam's red light terrors, not a place you want to be alone and sober!
The time we did spend in a total state of awareness we decided to sightsee. We battled through the grey circling watery mist aand knee-deep puddles to get some culture in us! A tre touristy canal boat trip to the Rijksmuseum, Veneers, Rembrandts, Night Watch(es)..no really..plastic watches in the gift shop with Rembrandt's Night Watch on them! Get off your high horse...it IS funny!
The shopping is a strange experience as everyone speaks near perfect english and you forget where you are. You start to go all arrogant white at-home shopper on their ass and tisk impatiently when they try and upsell when you should really be standing gawking in amazement that thay have words such as 'gel-insole support' in their vocabulary! Labels are hilarious though. I could not stop laughing at the ridiculous sounding words!! For instance our museum tickets said 'voorfdekoop' or something equally humourous, implying we had prepurchased the tickets form the hotel! And i couldn't stifle my giggles when the amazingly smart hotel attendant approached us and asked us if we required anything more from the 'boo fett' or when he was looking for a 'shpoon' for someone....mean...but hilarious!
The red light district is a bizarre experience. The majority of our wanderings saw me gaping, mouth wide at half naked flouro bikini bottom clad women posing seductively in their own shop windows, the spell broken only when the occasional lady of all hours was seen scratching her ankle and spilling ash from the cigarette dangling from her mouth while slumped on a pvc chair on her break.
After having sampled from the cultural milkshake which is Amsterdam's day time, it was time to leave the comfort of the crispy white sheets and minibar, and wander through the pot paraphernalia and stoner food to find somewhere for afternoon coffee and cake.
Law and Order was ever so frightful afterwards.
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